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Recent Movie Reviews

363 Movie Reviews

WHERE THE HELL DID THIS COME FROM!?

It's so fucking good! It's smooth and crisp and clean, professional studio quality work from everyone involved, this needs to be greenlit for a couple of seasons and a movie PRONTO. What an unexpected surprise to see on Newgrounds, I was absolutely blown away by the animation quality and getting the guy from Armored Saint to sing for him.

I loved every second of it. Fantastic job, and I hope that we're blessed with a continuation.

Exceptional work was done to these sets, props, wardrobe and characters. The environment and lighting were superb! Really impressive work, and inspiring that claymation / stop-motion animation is still going strong here on NG. Knox, eat yer heart out.

What were some challenges you encountered when making this short? I would love to hear, read, or watch the process to make this piece. Easy five from me, this was so cool and well done.

JWLustig responds:

Thank you! The greatest challenges were probably the set and puppet making. And setting up that long scene between Flap and Charlie knowing I'd be animating for like 3 days, securing everything down and praying I wouldn't screw up. Part of the reason I do 2D animation instead these days!

Holy shit guys, that's a lot of talent in one spot! For every short where the jokes weren't landing, there were three others that had me in stitches. Making this one of the strongest batting average, constantly funny collabs on NG. All it's missing were JohnnyUtah, Stamper, and MindChamber contributions.

That is all nitpicky as fuck, though- there's brilliant fucking animation all up in this, bouts of genius, REALLY FUNNY STUFF! Everyone did a kickass job, and it's so cool to see the finished product. Look at the runtime! This was entirely a treat. Thanks so much to everyone that worked on this! I slapped that five button so hard, and I'll be showing this off at work on Friday.

Recent Game Reviews

114 Game Reviews

Shellshock 2 is an impressive sequel by all accounts. 6 years later, it's still an addictive and active romp. A diverse community with a friends system in-game that reaches globally to other players who are logged in from many different websites, like ArmorGames and the like. Though it's frustrating that there is a "Friends Cap" of 12 player profiles. It makes no sense that the game forces you to delete older friends to make room for new ones.

Something I had discovered a few months ago when I picked this game up for the first time in several years. I was a level-capped veteran in Shellshock 1, and right off the bat, it allows you to cash in on that experience when you start anew in this version. I had left off my progress on this game at level 37, and it remembered all of the progress I had made- the weapons I had leveled up with experience, the custom tank I had unlocked with accumulated Tank Coins, and the stats I had divvied into Fuel, Traction, Armor, and Luck. I was at a great position to level up into the levelcap at 50.

But there are new tricks! Emblems next to certain names showed a number within a diamond. Prestige rank! Once at level 50, you're given the option to start over at level 1, and climb through the ranks to gain access to powerful Prestige weapons. There are 10 weapons, and if you prestige further than that, you're showing off. All of the XP progress you've made is kept, even the upgrade points put into your tank, but you're unlocking your arsenal all over again, which is challenging starting off as a rookie flanked by high level, high weapon-toting tanks all around you.

The community is still the worst part about it. Lots of racists, homophobes, and toxic idiots permeate the chat. You can mute them, but you can't mute their ability to ping the map with markers, arrows, and visual clutter. You can't report people, and you can't block them from entering rooms if you're trying to kick them out and keep them out. They can rejoin over and over and over again and you'll have to kick them manually every time. You also can't kick players out in mid-game if you're the host, which would've saved some headaches with particularly abusive or griefing players before they could screw over their team past a point of no-return.

You can either play in Deathmatches where each tank has HP represented in a red health bar, and Armor represented just above it with a blue armor bar. Or you can play for Points- every tank is invincible, armor is an unseen factor that reduces the damage a shot will make on you, and the game's length is determined by turns. From 5 turn quick games to 30 turn long games.

There's an option for Wind which can effect how certain shots behave, but not all. The wind can be set to low, medium, or high, and each have their respective XP bonus at the end of the match. There are some that argue that having High Wind in a game means "More XP" but you're actually losing more XP than you're gaining from the bonus because of the shots you're missing or incomplete shots that would benefit from standing still over a target now moved askew by wind. Wind isn't worth it in my opinion, unless you're just trying to switch it up and do something a little different or more challenging.

Games can be played Free For All or with Teams. If you play it in Free For All, there's a common unspoken rule in the community about "No Neighborshooting" in Deathmatches, because that's just seen as rude and cheap to them. Don't be surprised if some bloviating nutsack takes it personally if you neighborshoot in a Free For All.

In Team settings, a lobby can dictate if tanks are going to shoot one at a time, or if teams shoot together at once, or if everyone shoots at the same time. Individual Shot rooms take longer at a more relaxed, controlled pace. Sometimes it's beneficial to communicate to your team if you're trying to line up a shot on someone, because in a Team-Shot or All-Shot environment, sometimes damage from one weapon can cause another weapon to miss...communicating is beneficial in these circumstances, and you can do that publicly to the room or you can whisper to your teammates. I'll warn you though, if you have a maximum room of 6 tanks going for the longest setting at 30 turns on Individual Shot? I guarantee you that half of the room will quit before the game finishes, because those games take ages to complete. They seriously take a very long time, and it can be quite boring. If you died in a Deathmatch, you have the option to play Pong in-game while you wait for the game to wrap up...but that quickly gets stale and dull. Frustrating, because you'll lose whatever XP you've gained in the match if you leave early.

Also frustrating is if a teammate quits early, the game decides randomly which teammate gets to control the tank when it's supposed to be their turn. Say it's a 3 tank team, you're dead and the middle one quits, they could still give the controls to the other guy while you're sitting on your ass with nothing to do. The tank retains however the original player had leveled its stats (Fuel, Traction, Armor), and the game randomly selects one shot for you to use, and this will earn the shooter no XP benefits. These substitute tanks also cannot interact with boxes that are dropped in-game, nor damage multipliers. It already sucks and is a huge disadvantage when a teammate quits, but these added handicaps to the dead tank make it into a kind of slap in the face.

The game is standard "Free to Play, Pay to Win" format, incentivizing you at every turn to spend precious and rare tank coins on things in-game.

From the mundane and exorbitantly expensive chrome/gold rims, to items like "The Reinforced Barrel" which adds a percentage chance of critical damage to any shot. Or the dick-move Grappling Hook, which can yank a Box dropped on the field to you immediately, regardless of if you were close to it or not. Often-times stealing said box from a teammate or enemy right under their noses.

Boxes are sought after, they'll very rarely drop Tank Coins, which are hard to come by. They'll also drop weapons, sometimes premium weapons from weapon packs, deluxe arsenals, or even one's that exceed what your level has access to (this outcome is largely based on how you've leveled up your Luck stat, which I'll get to later). Uncommonly they can contain items you can use on the battlefield.

Arguably the most useful item is the Jetpack, which is great for leaping short distances to spread out from teammates, or to get yourself out of a compromising situation in the bottom of a pit or crater. The next most sought after item is the Tracer, which, when used once, plots the trajectory of your shot based on the angle and power you have set up at the time of activation...it's single-use, and can mean the difference in adjusting how you shoot a Sniper shot. There are also supply drops, which randomly equips you instantaneously with 5 new shots that you have access to (in case your current loadout is shit) and lastly, there's a shield bubble, which lasts a single turn rotation. Everyone hates it when you use the shield, it's never a cool or respectable move to protect yourself with the bubble, you will be chastized, boo'd, and hated for it. Never use the shield. Only bitch cowards use the shield.

Every 10 tank coins you earn can be spent on a Tank Upgrade point. I found out you only naturally achieve a Tank Upgrade token once a level for the first 50 levels. There isn't a single bar that should be below 1/4th's full.
-Traction should be maxed out. This is the stat that enables you to climb out of steep hills and terrain so you aren't stuck by some crater that's formed around you.
-Armor should be at 75% or full. That blue bar will help you last longer in Deathmatches, and lessen the damage you'll take in Points matches.
-Fuel definitely needs more than 50% of it upgraded- This is your movement range, and I shouldn't have to go into detail about how moving further is helpful, especially when coupled with good Traction stats.
-Luck may increase your chances of getting more Tank Coins and advanced weaponry on box drops in-game. It may be the least useful stat, because box drops are random and undependable in-game, but at the very least it could enable you to get an unexpected edge in combat, or at least a reward to dampen the blow of an inevitable loss.

But how you level up your tank is completely up to you, and will help with your survivability.

Or at least, as much as you can. There are extremely unfair weapons in the game; it's not balanced very well. Many deluxe/premium weapons take no effort to aim and wreak absolute high damage havoc. I got burned out many years ago trying to level up as a proud vanilla tank using no Deluxe weaponry, and you cannot compete against bought advantages. There are some that claim that not everyone buys these things with money, it just takes a lot of time to grind to the point where you can redeem tank coins for these things...and there are others that brag about their salary and gloat about how any and everything that can be maxed out in the game HAS been maxed out...and I encountered this shameless creature a few days ago in 2018. So I imagine it speaks well for KChamp games that they're still getting business from the cashcow that is Shellshock 2.

But for all the frustration I've experienced with people that were made better by bought advantages, and for all the times I'm annoyed by a stoner or kid slacking off in school messing up in a team environment, there have been some fun moments when it all goes according to plan. A clutch trick-shot with a Sniper bouncing off the border at the edge of the map... the wind guiding a luckily arranged volley of asteroids... Nuking 2/3rds of a team, or rarely, all 3 tanks of an enemy team. Watching some high-level asshole's weapon backfiring on him in the worst possible way... Even something as simple as the addiction of monitoring the candy-blue experience gauge on a weapon that you're trying to maximize it's potential by leveling up. There's a reason there's still an active community here. It just works! And that's really special and rare in a flash game.

Be warned, it'll suck you in. There'll be bad games that'll see you staring a "gg" in the face because you got killed by Firestorm and a Galaxy that caught a Double Damage modifier in the first round and you didn't have the opportunity to even shoot yet. There'll be idiots on your team that may be hellbent on ensuring that you lose, intentionally or unintentionally. You may need to communicate to a teammate who doesn't speak a language that you know, and sometimes, in more relaxed environments, that can be kinda cool. I had Google Translate up in another window and I was copy-pasting back-and-forth chatting with someone from Germany who didn't know very much english. Moments like that stick with me. Moments when I was nearing level 50 and I felt like the big-dick hero in the room protecting lower-leveled players in a Free For All felt good too. Finding yourself in a team that just "clicks" and works...and the best moments are when it's a really nice room filled with nice people, chatting it up and joking around, having fun. No pressure, no animosity, just a couple of strangers from different time zones shooting each other with little tanks.

I could recommend this game to someone that wants a simple turn-based accuracy game. Sometimes I can recommend it as an online chatroom thats ALSO a game. I'm still blown away its community is as active as it is. It slows down a bit at certain times, and other times there'll be pages of rooms looking for tanks to join. If you got a modest amount of disposable income, I suppose you could add to the likelihood that you'll have a good time. But I don't recommend doing that until you know that you'll be spending enough time in this game to make back your money's worth in enjoyment. Trust that they definitely want you to spend money on this.

It's an extremely competent game, free to play, pay to win, learning how shots behave and practicing your aim are the keys to success...and grind, baby, grind.

This gem from 2012 still holds up through the test of time.

It's almost there, but not quite. It looks and sounds great, interesting premise and setting. I don't think the "is this loss?" joke works in reference to a vertical stack of rocks.

At first I was frustrated at how limiting it was when I wanted to explore, but after I got to the train station, I got the jist of what was going on...this soul is mentioning how they love popcorn...that soul is mentioning how they love soda...etc, etc...

When I approached Farmer Bob, his initial greeting "WOOP" noise felt like it was layered over itself 30 times in a deafening, startlingly loud greeting. I tried recreating it by continuously chatting with him to no avail, it seemed like a one time anomaly and I'm not sure what's causing it. It definitely clipped audio and it didn't seem intentional.

Then I walk over to the giant crow right next to him, and just as I got to him he was walking towards me at the corner of the farmhouse next to the scarecrow with a shirt. This, somehow, lodged us both from being able to move. I was stuck in place and the giant crow seemed unable to move as well. I had to close the game from this bug.

JoelLikesPigs responds:

That’s unfortunate. This game was made in a relatively short amount of time so I apologize for the amount of bugs and other issues - I’ll be fixing this by this week

The loss joke has a relatively low chance of occurring and I wanted to initially stick it on a gravestone - but ran out of time making the asset for it - I’ll remove it for now until I get the grave stone made

That cat is gonna get the diabeetus.

Its like a less imaginative "Toss The Turtle" with the cuteness scaled WAY up. Really kid friendly, girls would love it because the cat is really fat and jiggly, and it makes cute noises. I wanted to rag on this game, but it kept me occupied, and I saw it through to the end.

Perhaps its just my computer, but there is an incredible lag. When the countdown clock starts after you complete a stage's goal, it takes about 3-4 real second for one second on the in-game timer to click off. This may be way I can tell the saxophone music from the Dodgy Mushroom is only meant to be played for 6 seconds when the record-needle-scratch chimes in and then it just loops...it didn't seem an intentional decision...in fact, the music came off to me like it was an unused track for Sushi Cat to be sexually attracted to someone/something, but a story-arc like that got scrapped because it wouldn't be kid-friendly anymore...I think advocating the use of hallucinogenic drugs was a much better alternative.

The overall musical score was well chosen. I can't really complain about it looping too often because of my Windows XP giving me bullet-time from the lag. The art direction was great! Simple, "less-is-more", but effective. I love the cat's jigglyness, but the gameplay itself was kinda mindless. Maybe that's the point, and maybe that doesn't matter because the target audience wouldn't be looking for a challenge anyway...just a "shift your brain and neutral and do a thing to kill time" kinda game. Even still, I found myself nodding off to sleep in the downtown stages, the final stretch before the moon launch...perhaps its for the better that this game is as short as it is.

I'm not sure I would play it again after earning that final cutscene. The lack of replay value is reflected in my score, but it wasn't a bad flash game, so I voted 5.

Recent Audio Reviews

75 Audio Reviews

Perfect music to back a party and add a flair of class to the ambiance. It's VERY conversational; smooth, groovy, and never disrupts itself or the atmosphere for the sake of it. This is the kind of thing you could put on for your lady by a fire-place...as opposed to 87% of the metal in my library which would be better suited for thrashing her INTO a fire-place.

It's a cool change of pace from the kind of music I expect to hear out of the Audio Portal, and on that note, it's really nice too. If I reviewed this a few years ago, I'd probably deduct points for it not standing out or being dynamic and complicated...but by being bluesy, and not deviating from the theme at it's core, it's sturdy at the foundation, and like I said, there is ABSOLUTELY demographics and situations that would absolutely call for this kind of talent. With that in mind, it excells at what it does. So full stars and vote!

Lageira responds:

Thanks man! I'm glad you liked it :)

I'm posting lyrics if anybody wants them...

"Draggin'ballZEE
Draggin'BALLzee
Draggin'ballZEE
Draggindraggindraggindraggin Ball! Ball! Ball! Ball!"

Ockeroid responds:

Thank you for posting. They have deep meaning and are very personal to me

This is pretty good, I don't know why you're so hard on yourself about it.

Needs to be longer, needs room to grow and dip and dive into time that mixes itself up. You're onto something good, dude. Fived!

Might need lyrics too :P

Sinitech responds:

I'm hard on myself because I'm hard for myself. I truly am a sexy beast.

And yeah, it will be longer once I finally get around to finishing it. As far as lyrics, this seems like it would be hard to do anything with to me. The drums sound kind of like they'd be awkward to keep on beat with, but I don't know because I don't sing or rap.

Recent Art Reviews

125 Art Reviews

You've really been on fire lately! Keep up the great work, I love your style and attention to detail!

Sony-Shock responds:

Aaah!! Thank you very very much! I'm going to keep trying my hardest! >v< *flexing emoji*

Interesting and different proportions, and a great eye for detail. I love her hair and how she kinda has this apple-leaf thing going on at the top. I got red blood pumping through me, so of course I love the strategic cleavage and hip windows. All-in-all, this is a really cool piece! Great job!

Is no one going to say it? No one's going to address that Cut Man bulge? This dude could pose up in a calendar for robot masters. Everything else is really cute about him, right down to the appealing and thematic background and his chubby, on-model arms. His innocent and friendly villain-face with his adorable bean mouth....then there's the bulge, and suddenly his furrowed brow and blushy cheeks have a different connotation.

His legs arrangement are kinda peculiar, reminiscent of anime schoolgirls with clumsy fawn-like legs jumbling over themselves. It looks unnatural, but at least it looks dynamic. The overall silhouette is appealing and framed with professional attention to detail. A mature use of gradients, and great looking lighting and shading choices bring the whole thing together, and the metallic effects on his blades are like the metallic cherry on top.

Great piece, absolutely worthy of being frontpage material. Voted 5!

Sony-Shock responds:

Okay, this is an amazing comment *_*

Just because of that, I'm editing the bulge out BUT I'm leaving a link to the original image so everyone can keep having their fun *thumbs up*

FUNNY ENOUGH, I had a female model as a reference, how does this happen

I'm a Pre-Production artist for Cyanide & Happiness! I'm also a professional voice actor, and I design t-shirts regularly. I haven't forgotten about you, Newgrounds. Some great things are just over the horizon for you all.

Geoff Galt @Phobotech

30, Male

Animatics

Dallas, TX

Joined on 9/22/03

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