View Profile Phobotech

All 118 Game Reviews

21 w/ Responses

Damn this game!

It's about as addictive as jacking off and cigarettes; I couldn't, for the life of me, stop.

I'm in class, and I'm just casually blamming and saving flashes, when I stumbled across this thing...I was going to briefly play it, and vote accordingly, but FML, it had me ensnared.

Time, after time, after time, I kept trying to beat my own score. Students over my shoulder gave it a shot, and it just got worse and worse. As I got closer to beating my own score, I would get more and more outraged whenever I died.

This game is addicting as hell. Mad props! The only thing I would add are transitioning backgrounds...like, every 200 distance it would shift into something new with some cool, distracting effects, to up the challenge.

Voted five!

Original, but just too damn short.

Lemme start by saying I love retro games; I grew up on the 8-bit NES. On top of that, I love music and music based games. Naturally, I had to give this flash game a shot.

With a hefty, big scaled screen, and consistent graphics throughout, this game delivered in the visuals department! Even gave a good, clean, original introduction cutscene! Although I'll have to admit, it's a little confusing after the Wizard disappears...

Immediately I picked up on how being turned to glass would effect the gameplay...really, that's a clever way to explain WHY you would die by touching things like in games like Silver Surfer...HE wasn't made out of glass, and just a tap would knock his ass down. Why more games haven't touched on this premise? I dunno...

But I'm getting side-tracked; it was confusing in the beginning because our protagonist never talks, wasn't clearly seen, or established as being our hero. Since the Bully was more distinct looking among the fish with his hat, had speaking roles, and continued speaking after the Wizard, I was under the impression that we were supposed to be the asshole bully fish...Our protagonist is mute? I thought he was frozen solid for some reason...all of the other fish did...but it was a minor misunderstanding that was quickly corrected in the beginning of the first level. Just thought I should share my reaction to how the intro was set up.

The gameplay was incredibly unique...key events happening along the side-scroller to the music was a neat touch, and the mobile save points were also very interesting. The moment that first statue starting blowing up in tune with the music, I grinned widely and proclaimed how awesome this game was going to be...I literally had to stop, scroll down and five it right then because I was pleased with anticipation.

The level went on, and the structure of the game held up solidly by changing the pace with the haunted ship, following the asshole fish. Still grinning, I trudged on...facing minor difficulties with the shifting ghost-fish and bats...

...wait...Bats? I thought we were in Atlantis! This aren't Aquabats, are they?

...No...not THOSE Aquabats...

Then we got to the whales mouth, and I'm like...Ohh, this oughta be interesting! Anticipating that I was going to encounter the mid-point of the level...maybe face a sub-boss (tee-hee! "Sub" boss...they're underwater...). Little was I aware of my grim impending disappointment.

It's not to say that the level was designed badly...the first time I heard the song, I thought it was awesome! So awesome that I honestly wanted it to go on longer to see what it would develop into, so you can understand that I was a little bummed getting to the final boss so soon. But, it was no biggie.

Oh shit. I died. Good thing I left an egg right by that cannon!

Wait, what? I gotta do the whole level over? ...Well, okay...at least it's short. Go through it again...jamming out a little lighter. Bounce the fireballs back into the Wizard...FUCK. Got hit again...

It became incredibly annoying not being able to save yourself from getting around that level...the boss fight was premature in it's arrival in the game, and what I didn't get was why the whole premise was discarded for the boss-fight. When Mega Man plays through the game, he runs, slides, jumps, and shoots. When he fights bosses, he does the same thing. When Starfox plays through a game, he bombs, blasts, brakes, boosts, and barrel rolls...When there's a boss, it's the same thing. This little fish played through the game timing his movements to music, level after level...why was all of that changed for the boss-fight? We get traded out from the catchy soundtrack we've been hearing for an comparitively bland and boring boss-theme. Take after Dr. Wily and make the final boss music the best out of the whole game!

The final fight wouldn't be a problem if the fish weren't as sluggish in the movements, but it's just rubbing our faces in it when we have to drone through the level repeatedly. Finally I just got fed up with it, and wrote the review.

Great game, but needs a sequel

I had only a few minor problems with Accelerant...

The melee attacks on the ground are underpowered, in my opinion. More-over, it's just a one-two punch, and it seemed to pass-up a perfect opportunity for a combo system similar to that of NG Rumble.

I find myself dreading hand-to-hand combat in this game, so it really just becomes a game of finding and using your next gun as soon as possible...that would be fine, (especially since it's set up to send in a new disposable agent to supply another weapon) except it takes so long to do any damage with your bare fists alone...and unless you can get the guy that was initially carrying the gun out of the way, he's going to be a nuisance. That really becomes a problem when fighting the final boss.

Then you get the Chainsaw and I think to myself, "Oh, well this is a lot better than using my bare fists, and easier to manage than worrying about ammo running out!" Except, the moment you pick up a gun that's been dropped, regardless if it has a full-clip, or one shot left, you'll discard whatever you're carrying to pick up whatever's sitting there.

I'd propose a system, since no-ammo melee attacks are so underpowered, where you can use the empty gun that you're holding as a club. Bash the hell out of the enemies with the stock, Halo style, and when you're ready to switch out, you can discard the weapon with the press of a button....or even better, THROW the used weapon as a projectile, like in Madness Interactive!

It's just tedious punching the crap out of things...so as a shooting platform, it urges you to start shooting by having your character being incompetent at anything else. Hell, a block function would be nice for some of these brawls too, but you have to just kind of rely on the thought that you'll punch or jump kick them first...and with a single air-melee attack, that gets old pretty quick too.

Going back to the gun pick up system, why doesn't Hank want to keep an array of weapons anymore? I liked the system in Madness Interactive where you could keep two guns at a time...one armed, and the other holstered, or on your back...too many times have I found myself saying, "Man, I wish I could take them both." That would be ideal once I acquire the Chainsaw, then I just stash it while I use guns. Run out of ammo, then whip the Chainsaw out again...repeat the process over and over again...but maybe that would make it too easy...

There are a few things that would've made it easier, but were taken out that I don't really mind. Like I said, after you steal the weapons from the agents, they just become nuisances. I try to make every shot count, so, if possible, I try to get the boss to kill the goons for me. Like the giant shot-gun wielding monster...I say "Thanks!" every time he blasts one of the guys that are trying to punch me, but whenever I get up close with a flamethrower or something, he'll club the shit out of me with that giant shot gun of his...if I don't get away, it knocks me across the stage, but it seems to pass right through the goons.

Despite it all, though, it's an addictive Run N' Gun game...if it weren't for the three lives system, dying would have become incredibly annoying (because you're constantly taking hits when you're ganged. Block function!) I found myself grinning time to time with how the stages and events played out, and all-in-all, it's still a thoroughly entertaining flash game.

Even though there isn't a pause function, I enjoy the fact that it has proceed arrows to help provide a break between fights.

The music was intense, and appropriate for the environment Krinkles had maintained from the beginning with his Madness series. The sound effects were well-chosen too, so full score in the sound department.

The visuals were amazing! MindChamber truly is a beast...his interpretation of the Madness textures and environment really set a new standard each year for Madness Day!

Great job, you guys! Voted 5, of course.

Crazy Addicting!

Gonzossm seems to have risen to NG celebrity-ism in the past year, and his great, retro video game inspired, colorful art help this game greatly.

Even with the amazing artwork, with hilarious circumstances brought upon the turtle, and very funny traps in store for him, the music in the background is PERFECTLY epic.

The medal system keeps the replayability up too. It's a great timekiller, medals or not, but for the life of me, I can't seem to get the turtle incinerated in the sun! Where the hell is the sun!?

...Guess I better keep playing to find out. Once again, perfect time killer! Looks great, plays great, sounds great (although that "Shiryoken!" from the banana stands out in it's loudness).

No bugs on my end. Well programmed, too!

...Now if you'll excuse me...I have a sun to feed!

Addicting and stimulating!

ParagonX9 always does a good job giving us that warm, Newgroundsy feel of olde...years and years later, that song is still good, but I would have include an option for the player to choose between a variety of songs; it's strangely only a 1.5 MB game, so it couldn't take up THAT much extra room, could it?

I would also include a bonus for those who are accurate; if you hit, and hit, and hit, and hit, without missing, you can gain combos that intensify your score dramatically, or even unlock special, previously unobtainable perks...you could also see to Tom about implementing the achievement system in this game to unlocking achievements through NG accounts; some users like to collect those.

I quickly found myself opting for speed and rapid power favoring over a balanced health system...I stayed tiny, but when enemies started coming out in suffocating swarms, I quickly upgraded to rapid fire. When I blurred my vision, and kept everything peripheral, I could concentrate on the brighter shade of color as the enemy, and manuever in tight-patterns dodging enemies and blasting only what's nearby until they started to spread thin...I began dying rapidly around the color changing one's (white-to-purple-to-red each time you hit them) because that threw my strategy off.

...Oh, and that strategy also didn't work with the super-fast purple ones. :P

The strafing shooting enemies were interesting at first, but never presented a huge challenge. I kept glancing at my health to see if I were getting hit, and I don't think they landed a single shot on me after their first encounter. There needs to be more enemies with projecting attacks, or even proximity attacks to counter my close-up, or "chase-me" tactics.

The game is pleasing to the eye, and as distinct a noise the data collection "twang" was, it never got annoying for me. It all had a very good feel to it. Since this is an incredibly visual game, I would suggest enemies that could alter or play on that. One's that are two dimensional and seem to flip, to give the illusion that their visibility wanes off and on as they strobe their way towards the player...or flare orbs that emit and abundantly radiant light to cloak other enemies that could be hiding in the aura. Stuff like that wouldn't be too atrociously difficult to add, but could turn the tide of difficulty in the stage.

I think you're on the right track; I had fun playing this! Keep up the good work!

spectre1989 responds:

Thanks for such a detailed review, and I'm really glad you liked it. Those are some great ideas for possible sequels too, hopefully I can really play with the visual aspects next time :)

Truly AWESOME game!

I've been killing time with this thing for the past couple of hours, actually. It's addicting as hell, and the challenge is completely dependent on the individual's strategy.

There's a variety of maps, however, some tend to repeat more than others. What would truly be an excellent feature (if you'll ever do a sequel to this) is a map editor function.

I've yet to play Multiplayer and Hard is only difficult because that ONE extra person they get really makes all the difference.

Regardless, though, the gameplay is spectacular! The zany, white-collared environment somehow brings me back to the days of After Dark screensavers, although don't ask me why...maybe it's the satire of the office environment.

Either way, I fell in love with this game. It's something I'm sure many a co-workers have dreamed playing out in their cubicles, and each different personality is perfectly balanced from each other.

I would change nothing about this game except for a wider variety of maps. (Maybe, MAYBE more power-ups) ...and now that I think of it, a little personalization couldn't hurt too...like, you could choose if you were from Gray Solutions, or Beige Dynamics...or Maroon Enterprises, or Some-Other-Boring-Color Conglomerate...y'know? Not just Gray every time.

It's addictive, fun gameplay as well as a great chance at exercising spontaneous strategical skills, The whacky animations and sound effects help it along as well.

All-in-all, this was a really well-made game, and I'd love to play more things like this; a beefy sequel would be welcomed with loving arms from many of us!

And hey! From Adult-Swim, no less!

Keep up the great work!

I. Love. This. Game.

I had played all the way up to the tanks before I got my first game over screen, and what compelled me to write this review was I LAUGHED HARD when I got it.

"You have ruined everything." is now my favorite game over screen from any game I have ever played.

Artistically, I love how everything looks. The hand animated cut scenes LOOK great! They're all charming, and put a smile on my face, and I feel like I'm playing a pro game...the distinct difference between the game play and the cut scenes bring back fond memories of playing on a Playstation, and somehow stir up an emotional sense of accomplishment whenever the cut scenes occur.

(^^That was meant to be a compliment)

I've only played the main game, and so far, it's SO much fun...I'm probably getting nothing done today because of this. It's a style of game play that genuinely requires awareness of your surroundings, and the feel for it is fluid and satisfying (see what I did there? I'll wait...okay, did you get it? Good. Keep reading.) The physics engine is really well thought out, and the more I think about how I'm a Cowboy riding bareback on a giant flying sperm, crushing people, and destroying shit with careless abandon...the more awesome that sounds...lol

The only way that this can be improved (as far as I can tell as I have yet to play the whole thing through again) is a combo system would be quite rewarding for the superior Seed Riders, who dart and manuever skillfully, getting anything up to a x10 combo bonus, and losing the bonus over a few seconds of no-kills.

Hell, you could even make an achievement out of the C-C-C-COMBO riders. XD

I'm going to be playing this for a long time...I'm loving how 2009 has been a very innovative, creative year so far for flash games.

I love both of you guys for making this! The music is charming, the sfx appropriate, the graphics and animations are badass, as is the premise and the actual gameplay itself. I will likely be striving for 100% unlocks, and I know what I'll be playing when I'm bored at some place with internet connection.

One of the most creative flash games I've played.

What I loved most about the game was the challenge; It took me a good three days-worth of tries to beat this game. I'd get on, get stuck on a part and try it over and over and over again, before I would close it to get back to it. Thankfully, due to the cookie system, it picks up right where I left off.

Manipulating the cute little guy in the beginning, it was already different than anything than I expected when you had to manipulate around our character's ability to vomit strategically...and he holds quite a lot too!

...it's a good thing, as I recycled quite a bit, just in case I needed more after a certain event...

But I loved, LOVED how after every chapter, it introduced a new phase of genetic mutation.

Normally, you're the enthusiastic little pink grub who can vomit bile all over the place, time a propelled jump, and swim in your own liquid filth.

After that, you get a far-out looking white grub that spews foam which you can swim within in the air...I found this form the most difficult to navigate, as it usually takes a lot of foam in one area in order for you to "swim" in...and even then, gravity still holds some laws in that you have to swim quickly to avoid sinking.

I'm not bitching or anything...as far as foam-spewing air-swimming goes, that seems reasonably realistic. The fact that it takes so much foam to do what you need to do just adds to the challenge.

Soon after the airhead mode, we're treated to the Red Spewer...I'm going out on a limb to assume that it's blood, which is a pretty safe assumption, as this red liquid JETS out at a much higher velocity than the vomit from stage 1. The wicked, evil grin on the character somehow turns something ordinarily creepy and unhealthy into something cool...how, I'm not sure. But this allows you to propel yourself higher by regurgitating down, and get some impressive range when trying to activate switches from afar...sort of like an Archer Fish, but with blood.

...I think there's a lizard like that...

After the red mutation, you're introduced to a familiar face; a black Gishy form, which seems to spew a black, tar-like substance that solidifies after it hits any other surface. I found this form to be the most useful, because a skilled hand can minimize the amount of "tar" used...balancing on a single or double spit-wad on a wall, and repeating a process over and over again. You can form bridges, towers, staircases...and as long as you can reach it, you can gobble it up to recycle it again.

The Spewer has to undergo a lot of obstacles...rotating spikes, mostly, and pools of acid or no fun. The mechanics of the acid are fluid enough to be treated like a heavier vomit...now if only there was a way to use that stuff to our advantage......

...Thank God for the Yellow mutation, which holds and spits up acid. It's useful when having to travel grounds that hold pools of otherwise lethal doses of acid, you can swim through it like nothing. But often you'll find yourself in a situation in the yellow-form where it would be incredibly foolish for you to just release everything all at once; You'll have to reach a switch which is blocked by a material you can burn through...but there are more sensitive things that could also be burned around you...such as, the ground below you....which is the only thing keeping you from becoming chum. I found the best course of action for these kind of hurtles are to be patient, and just...(bear with me for sounding perverted) spit, swallow, spit, swallow...just be sparse...

Visually, the game is impressive and easy to look at. The mad scientist in the background succeeds in compounding the atmosphere intended, that you're a little lab creature being tested. I noticed that you have the option to turn it off for those that are easily distracted, but it never drew my focus from the puzzle at hand.

Audibly, little Spewer is adorable...and his little grunts and death cries match his cute expressions. The music, oddly enough, never became annoying, despite how much I played this

I'm running out of space; the ending was awesome! Perfect game!

An absolute classic

I can't believe this was submitted in '06...I could've sworn I had played this before then...

...perhaps my memory isn't that great, and I can accept that...but this game is just as addictive now as it was back when I first played it years ago. Exercises the shit out of my clicking finger.

WHEN'S PICO 2 COMING OUT TOM!? Your wife can take care of your baby, for cryin' out loud!

As for the medals; hint-hint, shoot anything, and be a nuisance, and you'll get them all. ;D

(I'm all for letting the gamers find out for themselves how to unlock the secrets...)

Oh My GOD, what a beast...

It took me five tries to finally beat that ass-goblin, but I finally did it.

The level-down, boss-repair is a really interesting feature; really sets a sense of urgency when it comes to your stamina bar. "Oh shit, I'm getting low...better back off and play dodge-ball for a while until it recharges" because even if you press the crap out of those buttons, you're almost GUARANTEED one level down.

I mostly stuck with aerial attacks, hopping in up and down the stage, and almost never beside him because of that horrifying ground punch he does...and even when he does knock me down with one, I have to move to an area around him and quickly throw up my sheild incase of a cannonball...

...but what really messed me up was that buzzsaw...and holy crap, it has a reach to it...the only thing, ONLY thing that would make this easier is being able to move up or down in mid-jump, as that suits my strategy of attacking him in the air.

Even though this is one boss-fight, it's exhausting...when I found out you have to drain the PILOT'S health after you first break the armor, I shouted "NO!" because I thought I was coming close to beating it, finally...

...nope...not even close...lol

The challenge is refreshing, and I personally think you shouldn't dumb it down. As brutal as this giant wooden mobile suit is, it still contains a lot of comical quality in it through the details; the magic jump when I first did it made me laugh out loud, and the tiny expressions on the knight's face in the background and the pilot's "OH SHI-" draw a grin on my face while I'm intently manuevering and bashing away.

At no point in this game did I get bored with it, or just shove the keyboard away pouting "man, to hell with this game!" I wanted to play it to the end...and even after all that effort, I STILL haven't unlocked all the medals, so it's got some replayability to it.

Great job, MindChamber...and Happy belated Pico Day!

MindChamber responds:

thanks, Im really glad you kept with it, and even happier to know you beat it.


I'm a Pre-Production artist for Cyanide & Happiness! I'm also a professional voice actor, a published author, and I design t-shirts & artwork for heavy metal bands in the DFW area. Check out my links, check out my stuff, and stick around for a while! -GG

Geoff Galneda @Phobotech

34, Male

Animatics, Voice Act

Dallas, TX

Joined on 9/22/03

Exp Points:
24,370 / 24,520
Exp Rank:
Vote Power:
8.83 votes
Global Rank:
B/P Bonus: